Sweet Swine County Groups & Clubs

"Join the fun and discover why our community is so hog-wild about getting together!"

"Bringing the Tears: The Professional Mourners Club Celebrates a Decade of Sorrowful Service!"

One of Sweet Swine County's best known clubs--The Professional Mourners Club --is celebrating it's 10th year. The popular club enhances the sadness at special events throughout the county including anniversary parties, lodge meetings, bachelorette parties, and retirement parties--literally wherever a tear could be shed in a special moment when tears are so needed. Club president, Ima Tearson told Sweet Swine Scoop, "Event planners may book all 19 members of The Professional Mourners for large, sad events, or just book the famed Wailing Sisters for smaller functions. Whatever your mourning needs, The Professional Mourners are guaranteed to make a sad moment the saddest ever!"


""Upholding Decency: The Legion’s Vow to Keep Sweet Swine County Scandal-Free!"

The Legion of Decency board, comprised of notable, decent, well-fed and successful citizens of Sweet Swine County, is dedicated to enforcing "The Swine Code," which restricts the airing of anything deemed too grossly indecent on TV or radio. Earl Silo, the board's Vice Treasurer, explained, "It's a set of rules created by the founders in the 1930s to keep our county clean and respectable. These codes have never been broken, but when they are, the Legion of Decency will take action!"

Ms Judith Vanderswine the Legion of Decency permanent part-time president on The Women of Sweet Swine County


"Strands of Success: Lawyer Ed’s 'Comb-Over Society' Turns Hair Loss Into High Art!"

In the early 1990s, Lawyer Ed launched a wildly successful Internet hair-loss club for men called "The Comb-Over Society." This exclusive group has attracted high-profile members like Donald Tramp, Bruce Wills, and Ted Dancer—all of whom have mastered the fine art of strategic hair placement. With Ed at the helm, the society has become the go-to resource for tips on how to turn a receding hairline into a bold fashion statement. After all, why let a little hair loss get in the way of a great comb-over?