Sweet Swine County Politics
Where Every Candidate Demonstrates That Knowledge of the Issues is Optional!"
Sweet Swine County, home to not one, not two, but four illustrious political parties, each with their national headquarters firmly rooted in the heart of a county no one has ever heard of!. Though these parties have rarely found anyone brave (or willing) enough to represent them, 2016 was a banner year—all four Sweet Swine County political parties somehow managed to field candidates for president!
However, this brief political renaissance quickly unraveled, as every single candidate left the race in disgrace, their campaigns unraveling faster than a bale of hay. KLUK TV covered every scandalous moment in detail, from campaign meltdowns to concession speeches that were more like comedy sketches. In Sweet Swine County, politics might not always be pretty, but it sure is entertaining!
THE GULLIBLE GILT PARTY
Prairie Ann Smacovich presidential political ad
CAUTIOUS CHICKEN PARTY
Earl Silo presidential political ad
COMB-OVER PARTY
Lawyer Ed presidential political ad
HASTY BOAR PARTY
Ronnie P Silage presidential political ad
In 2016, KLUK TV—after much hesitation—agreed to air the one and only presidential debate held in Sweet Swine County. Though major candidates like Clinton, Trump, and the ever-controversial Lawyer Ed were no-shows, the debate carried on. Political pundits from across the county unanimously agreed that the three brave parties who did show up really spoke to the pressing issues closest to Sweet Swine constituents’ hearts.
Topics ranged from the vital importance of roadside pie stands to the controversial “more corn, less soy” initiative. While it may not have made national headlines, the debate was the political event of the year in Sweet Swine County—complete with awkward silences, heated discussions about barn repairs, and one candidate accidentally knocking over the podium with a stray horseshoe toss.
All in all, a Sweet Swine County classic!
Welcome to KLUK TV’s exclusive, wall-to-wall coverage of the shocking—and let’s face it, downright hilarious—demise of Sweet Swine County’s four bold candidates who ran for president in 2016! Against all odds, and perhaps better judgment, these local hopefuls threw their hats in the ring, each dreaming of a spot in the Oval Office. But alas, the road to Washington, D.C. proved far bumpier than a ride down Main Street during pothole season.
From campaign launch parties featuring hay bales and pigs-in-a-blanket, to disastrous debates where one candidate mistook the national debt for a raffle prize, KLUK TV captured every misstep. By the time the final votes were counted (and promptly discarded due to, let’s say, “creative” tallying methods), all four candidates had left the race in a flurry of scandal, confusion, and perhaps a bit too much homemade moonshine.
Tune in to relive the drama, the laughs, and the sheer absurdity that could only happen in Sweet Swine County politics!